Feeling stuck and in a funk is not something I do well. A couple weeks ago, I felt challenged to experience the joy that I believe is innate within my Being. I knew it was there yet the thick clouds of feeling down hid that spark within and I felt lethargic and unmotivated.
That following weekend, I spent time with my sister, my father and his wife. I had a waterfall tearfest and released my feelings of stress, overwhelm and vulnerability of living in a new town, with a new job, and striving to cultivate new friends and community. Not only was I feeling sad, my brain felt discombobulated, sketched out, and off-balance.
It was time to take action! In addition to talking to my dear family members, good friends, and reflecting on my pity party journal writing, I realized that I needed to tweak and improve my wellness and self-care so that I could uplift myself instead of remain stagnant and status quo blah-feeling.
Getting a professional massage helped finish off week two of the blah’s. That same Friday evening, I ate sushi with a girl friend and attended a museum event where I got to paint, see people’s unique (a.k.a. bizarre) collections, and socialize. I committed to going surfing each day there was surf and thankfully, that got to start the next day.
On Saturday and Sunday, I not only surfed but got to visit with my mother who was in town. We saw a fun children’s play, ate good food and went for walks in the sunshine. She was a positive and encouraging sound board with her always gentle space holding.
Sunday morning, it hit me that laying in bed and writing wasn’t what my body truly needed. I motivated to put on my running shoes and power up my favorite dance music while I cruised near the beach. I am happy to report that my morning runs continued on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday (albeit in the dark and mist).
My attitude and morning mood has felt noticeably more positive. I like the mystery of the quiet dawn and morning fog. I appreciate making time to get in at least an hour’s worth of surfing after work on days there are waves to catch. Even on days when the water is calm, seeing sea mammals and birds brings me joy.
My realization is that I must make these active wellness choices. It’s this or miss out on the beauty of my oceanside town and the shimmering vitality of my life. Choosing radical self-care is a path with which I’ve grappled. Sometimes, I experience self-judgment that I need to schedule so many activities to insure that I feel healthy and positive about myself.
Then I sit with the reality that my eating wholesome food, sleeping well, sitting in meditation, refraining from using intoxicants, and getting daily exercise are all about choosing self-love. This in turn, helps me cultivate my mission to help empower others to choose to love themselves in radical, healthy, and active ways.
Care to join me on this wellness journey?